Detoxicity: By Men, About Men, For Everyone

DetoxPod 161 : Tarik Carroll AKA AMIR (Musician/Visual Artist)

In this episode, Tarik Carroll (AKA AMIR), a Brooklyn-based creative, photographer, musician, and fat liberation activist, shares his journey of self-discovery and healing through art. He discusses the intersection of photography and music in his life and the role of art in his healing process. Tarik also delves into the concept of fat liberation and the challenges of navigating fetishization in media as well as within the queer community. He shares his experiences with identity and sexuality, emphasizing the importance of self-awareness and setting boundaries in relationships. We also discuss his goals for the future, finding balance and self-compassion, establishing a morning routine and setting boundaries, and his upcoming music project 'Three of Swords.'

DetoxPod 160 : Ned Donovan (Actor/Creator) Returns!

I'm super psyched to welcome actor and creator Ned Donovan back to the show. Ned first appeared back in Episode 49, recorded at the height of the pandemic, and discussed the loss of his parents, a medical hiccup in his performing career, and growing up in Maine.
 
In this conversation, Ned catches us up on the last three years in his life and shares his journey in acting, production, and his personal life. He discusses his experiences with fertility challenges and the emotional rollercoaster of undergoing surgeries, IVF cycles, and the search for a sperm donor. Despite setbacks and obstacles, Ned remains resilient and determined to start a family. This conversation explores the emotional toll, financial struggles, and societal expectations surrounding fertility treatment. The couple shares their journey of failed IVF and IUIs, miscommunication and mistakes made by the medical industry, and the disparity in support and options for women. They discuss the impact on their relationship and the challenges of balancing personal success with their partner's struggles. The conversation highlights the importance of being present and supportive as a partner, getting tested for fertility issues, and finding humor in the dark moments. It also sheds light on the financial burden of fertility treatment and the ineptitude of the healthcare system. The conversation explores the challenges of salaries in the entertainment industry and the broader issue of capitalism.
Takeaways
Fertility challenges can be emotionally and physically draining, requiring perseverance and support.
The IVF process can be complex and expensive, involving multiple procedures and tests.
Having a supportive partner and a strong support system is crucial during fertility struggles.
Exploring alternative options, such as sperm donation and adoption, can provide hope and new possibilities. Fertility treatment can take a significant emotional toll on both partners, and it is important to be present and supportive throughout the process.
Miscommunication and mistakes made by the medical industry can exacerbate the already challenging journey of fertility treatment.
Societal expectations of manhood and fertility can be deeply ingrained, and it is important to unpack and challenge these beliefs.
Balancing personal success with a partner's struggles can be difficult, but open communication and empathy are key.
Getting tested for fertility issues is important for both partners, as male infertility can also be a factor.
Finding humor in the dark moments can help navigate the emotional challenges of fertility treatment.
The financial burden of fertility treatment can be significant, and access to affordable options is limited. Many people in the entertainment industry struggle to make a living wage, even with multiple jobs.
The current system of capitalism is seen as a nightmare that perpetuates inequality.
There is a need for systemic change to address the issues of salaries and income inequality.

DetoxPod 159 : Josh Antonuccio (Musician/Educator)

Josh Antonuccio is the director of the school of media studies at Ohio University, and as such, encounters hundreds of impressionable young folks annually to help advance them in their media careers. Josh also runs the university's annual Music Industry Summit, an annual event that has brought legends like Run the Jewels and Jason Isbell to the institution to share their knowledge. Josh, himself, is a renowned musician, producer and engineer with his own studio in the Ohio town of Athens.
 
In this conversation, Mike and Josh discuss various topics related to building trust, the importance of face-to-face conversations, the power of collaboration and creativity, encouraging openness and pursuing passions, finding center through breathing and faith, and the flow state and the power of creativity.
Takeaways
Building good relationships requires trust, honesty, and consistency.
Face-to-face conversations are essential for meaningful connections and personal transformation.
Collaboration with passionate and driven individuals can lead to creative breakthroughs.
Encouraging openness and supporting children's passions can lead to personal growth and fulfillment.
Finding center through breathing, meditation, and faith can help navigate challenging situations.
Engaging in creative activities can bring about a flow state and a sense of timelessness.

DetoxPod 158 (Valentine's Day Special!): Kristopher Lovestone (Author/Sex Educator)

In this conversation, Mike and Kristopher discuss various aspects of sexuality, intimacy, and personal growth. They explore alternative options for intimacy and healing, such as working with certified sexual bodyworkers. They also discuss the importance of making sexual wellness more accessible to the average person. The conversation delves into reaching those who haven't started doing the work of personal growth and expanding the narrative of sexuality in aging. They also address the challenges of dealing with erectile dysfunction and body changes, and the impact of diet and lifestyle on sexual health. The conversation concludes with a discussion on creating special spaces for intimacy and taking pride in appearance and self-care.
Takeaways
Consider alternative options for intimacy and healing, such as working with certified sexual bodyworkers or somatic sex educators.
Make sexual wellness more accessible and affordable to the average person, similar to psychology and therapy.
Reach out to those who haven't started doing the work of personal growth and provide resources and support.
Address inner needs beyond physical pleasure to achieve holistic sexual health and integration.
Expand the narrative of sexuality in aging and recognize the value of experience in sexual mastery.
Explore the impact of diet, lifestyle, and exercises on sexual health and address issues like erectile dysfunction.
Consider using toys and tools to enhance sexual experiences and explore new possibilities.
Create special spaces for intimacy and prioritize self-care to enhance sexual relationships.
Navigate the challenges of dealing with the shadow feminine and develop tools for healthy communication and boundaries.
Embrace personal growth as a continuous journey and accept the challenges that come with it.

DetoxPod 157 : Elliot Aronow (Wearer of Many Figurative & Literal Hats)

In this conversation, multi-hyphenate Elliot Aronow discusses his work in helping men advance spiritually, creatively, and sartorially. He highlights the problem of stereotyping men's work and the importance of breaking free from societal expectations. Elliot shares his personal journey, from his early interest in fashion to his career in media and music. He emphasizes the significance of taking initiative and making things happen, as well as the role of personal style in self-expression. Elliot also discusses the challenges he faced in his 30s and the importance of community and creative pursuits in personal growth. The conversation explores various themes related to masculinity and community-building. It touches on the subcultures of people with Staten Island roots, the need to widen the spectrum of masculine expression, and the misconceptions about men's work. The discussion also highlights the lack of empathy for men and the failure to speak to men on the progressive side. It explores the importance of creating an alternative to right-wing masculinity and motivating men without shame. The conversation emphasizes the value of male community, rediscovering unstructured time, and the need for intergenerational male relationships. It concludes with a discussion on the importance of taking the lead in building male community and the need for a constructive clubhouse.
Takeaways
Stereotyping men's work is a significant problem that limits personal growth and self-discovery.
Taking initiative and making things happen is crucial for personal and professional success.
Personal style and fashion can be powerful tools for self-expression and building confidence.
Navigating the dark night of the ego and facing personal challenges can lead to profound personal growth.
Talk therapy alone may not be sufficient for personal transformation; creative pursuits and action are essential for manifesting change.
Building a supportive community and having strong leadership are key factors in personal development. There are different subcultures of people with Staten Island roots, such as the Jiu-Jitsu community and colonic hydrotherapists.
Men's work needs to widen its spectrum of expression to be more accessible and appealing to a broader audience.
Misconceptions about men's work include the association with hating women or wilderness retreats, which can deter people from engaging in self-development.
There is a lack of empathy for men, especially post-MeToo, which can lead to men feeling misunderstood and isolated.
The progressive side has failed to speak to men effectively, leading some to seek validation and acceptance from right-wing ideologies.
Creating an alternative to right-wing masculinity involves promoting a positive and inclusive definition of masculinity that does not demonize men.
Motivating men without shame involves allowing them to be themselves and providing spaces for open and honest conversations.
Building male community is essential for men's well-being and can be achieved through regular interactions and shared activities.
Rediscovering unstructured time and engaging in vigorous nerditude can foster creativity, connection, and personal growth.
Intergenerational male relationships are valuable for learning from different perspectives and experiences.
Taking the lead in building male community requires individuals to step up and create spaces for connection and support.
There is a need for a constructive clubhouse or salon-type event for men to gather, share ideas, and build relationships.
Authenticity and unfocused writing can create a genuine and relatable connection with readers.

DetoxPod 156:Ethan Schiff (Integrative Health Coach)

In the name of starting 2024 on a path of personal betterment and delivering positive, powerful messages I am psyched to welcome Ethan Schiff to the show. Ethan is an integrative health coach (find out what that is when you listen), and discusses the importance of connecting emotional and physical health. He shares his personal journey of weight loss and self-discovery, highlighting the need for a holistic and practical approach to health goals. Schiff also addresses the fear-based culture in the music industry and the challenges of setting boundaries. He emphasizes the importance of unlearning conditioning and embracing authenticity. The conversation explores the concept of self-complexity and the ability to contain multitudes. Schiff encourages individuals to become who they truly are and separate their identity from their profession. In this conversation, Mike and Ethan Schiff discuss body image and the journey of self-acceptance. They explore how body image can change throughout weight loss and the challenges that come with it. They also discuss the importance of shifting from a need to change mindset to one of acceptance. The conversation delves into male body dysmorphia and the lack of conversation around it. They emphasize the need to normalize these conversations and create a safe space for discussing body image. Finally, they talk about coping mechanisms and the importance of self-awareness in taking care of oneself and setting boundaries.
Takeaways
Integrative health coaching focuses on connecting emotional and physical health to achieve holistic well-being.
Quick fixes are not sustainable and often stem from feelings of inadequacy.
Setting small, achievable goals and building momentum is key to long-term success.
The music industry's fear-based culture and lack of boundaries can lead to burnout and neglect of personal well-being.
Unlearning conditioning and embracing authenticity are essential for personal growth and self-discovery. Body image can change throughout weight loss and it can be challenging to navigate.
Shifting from a need to change mindset to one of acceptance is important for self-acceptance.
Male body dysmorphia is a common but often invisible challenge that needs more conversation and support.
Normalizing conversations around body image is crucial for creating a safe space for discussion.
Coping mechanisms can temporarily cover up emotions, but self-awareness and addressing the underlying feelings is essential for long-term well-being.
Showing up for oneself involves being intentional about recognizing and articulating one's feelings and needs.
Taking care of oneself and setting boundaries is an act of self-care and should be normalized.

DetoxPod 155: Justin Levenson (Author/Executive)

Justin Levenson, a music industry professional and author, shares his journey of mentorship, service, and maintaining a positive mindset. Growing up in a multicultural household, Justin recognized the impact of music educators and mentors in his life. He emphasizes the importance of balance, service, and self-love in his personal and professional growth. Justin's experience with brain cancer further deepened his commitment to helping others and spreading positivity. He discusses the challenges of building meaningful relationships and the need for open conversations. Justin's mission is to inspire others to make the world a better place and find joy in their own lives. In this conversation, Justin Levenson discusses his career options, the value of therapy, dealing with money issues, gaining perspective through personal experiences, finding support and mentorship, and self-care practices. He also talks about celebrating transformation.
 
Takeaways
Mentorship and service play a crucial role in personal and professional growth.
Balancing work, life, and service is essential for overall well-being.
Self-love and acceptance are key to maintaining a positive mindset.
Open and honest conversations are necessary for building meaningful relationships. Consider exploring different career options and finding what aligns with your strengths and passions.
Therapy can provide valuable insights and an unbiased perspective on personal challenges.
Money issues can be emotionally challenging, but it's important to have a healthy relationship with money and seek support when needed.
Personal experiences, such as illness, can lead to personal growth and a shift in perspective.
Finding support and mentorship can be instrumental in navigating life's challenges.
Self-care practices, such as exercise, mindfulness, and healthy eating, can contribute to overall well-being.
Celebrating personal transformation and milestones can be a meaningful way to reflect on growth and progress.

DetoxPod 154: Mark Marshall (Musician/Educator)

Mark Marshall shares his journey from growing up in a small town in Pennsylvania to becoming a successful musician and composer in New York City. He discusses the challenges of living with disabilities and the impact of a toxic environment on his life. Mark's love for music and his desire to escape his situation led him to pursue a career in music. Moving to New York City provided him with the freedom and opportunities he had always longed for. Despite the negative experiences he has faced, Mark has found strength and support in his wife Abby and continues to move forward in his musical journey. In this conversation, Mark Marshall discusses his journey of self-reflection and personal growth, seeking therapy and support, navigating family dynamics and relationships, balancing multiple roles and responsibilities, and finding relaxation and balance in his life.
Takeaways
Living in a toxic environment can have a profound impact on one's mental and emotional well-being.
Financial wealth does not guarantee happiness; quality of life and personal fulfillment are more important.
New York City offers a sense of freedom and acceptance for individuals who feel like outcasts in their hometowns.
Overcoming adversity requires self-awareness, therapy, and the support of loved ones.
Music can be a powerful outlet for expressing emotions and finding solace in difficult times. Self-reflection and self-awareness are crucial for personal growth and breaking free from negative patterns.
Seeking therapy and support can be transformative and help in overcoming challenges.
Family dynamics can have a significant impact on one's well-being and relationships.
Balancing multiple roles and responsibilities requires adaptability and diversification of skills.
Finding moments of relaxation and balance is essential for mental and emotional well-being.